A4everfamily.org is a great resources for adoptive families. We have talked about it for years and I know how hard it will be but......................reading all this and more just reminds me to say: Please don't take it personally, we love you, we just want to do what is best for our daughter who has been through so much in her short 13 months. Please see a few points below:
*As hard as it may be, even if she looks like she really wants to be held by you, she NEEDS to have a strong attachment to her parents first. Something as simple as passing the baby from one person to another or allowing others to hold a baby who is not attached can make the attachment process that much longer and harder. Remember there is often a honeymoon period after the child arrives. Many babies do not show signs of grief until months after they come home.
*Not spoiling or coddling but sometimes that might be exactly what an adoptive child needs to overcome attachment disorder.
*traditional parenting advice may not be used. A child who is at risk of attachment issues needs consistent reinforcement that mama & poppy will always take care of and keep her safe.
**We truly are looking for our girl to heal and form healthy secure attachments. Thank you for respecting our wishes and we will see you soon.
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1 comment:
Wonderffully said. You are her parents and will do what is best for her. Hopefully others will respect that and know you mean well. Enjoy your daughter, she is beautiful.
Kathy(mom to Rieley, Jiangxi beauty.)
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